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Thursday, October 04, 2012

Crime & Punishment



The Trial of Texas Pete:
Crime: rape of multiple chickens and general noise pollution.  
Verdict: most definitely guilty. 
Punishment: capital.

The Masaka Municipal court heard evidence this week of the deviant behaviours of one Texas Pete residing in plot 8 Nsingisira Rd, Bwala. His Honor, Judge Timothy Crow, heard evidence of the flagrant disregard of the noise pollution laws (late night and extremely noisy neighbourhood prayer group take note!)  as well as outrageous pillaging of multiple chickens. His deliberation was only momentary as he passed judgement without mercy: death by decapitation, to be carried out on Thursday 27th September. 


Last minute appeals by Mr. Pete's lawyers were unsuccessful, and with no hope of a reprieve, Texas Pete made a break for it during his transfer from his hutch on death row to the execution chamber. The executioner, Mr. Lubega, was given a fair run around, but this scoundrel was no match for the seasoned garroter. By 12:01pm Texas Pete had met his maker, whilst the Thursday woman's group chose to celebrate the swift hand of justice with a Thai Red Curry. 


Fear ye not, though, we are not lacking chicken company.  A new chicken, Penfold, was rescued from the brink of consumption just a week or two ago, although her new fate (being hen pecked non-stop by the other ladies, in between being pillaged by the late Texas Pete) has been far from carefree. 
Mr Magoo, on the other hand, is going from strength to strength, and on two occasions has actually spent twenty minutes sitting with us on the outside sofa, letting us stroke her, before laying an egg before our eyes.  Sarah’s father, on receiving this news, was most perplexed since he knows a fellow runner whose nickname is Mr Magoo.  He did wonder why on earth his friends would have spent the afternoon stroking this gentleman, and was further confused as to why this would have resulted in the production of an egg!

Jaffie Joffer, Ruler of Zamunda, our fine and very fierce “guard dog” has finally become a reality.  In some ways it is like a practice time for having our baby in due course, since all she seems to do is poo, pee, and vomit, as well as whimpering, chewing things or generally causing mischief!  Whilst we doubt our human baby will be biting our ankles within a day or two of arrival, let us not rashly jump to that conclusion – we will have to wait and see.... 

Work-wise (and there is some, honest!), the plans for setting up our Kitovu Hospital Neonatal Unit are coming along, and over the coming months we are looking to find individuals and groups who will be willing to sponsor the venture.  We need either 10 people to sponsor 60 pounds a month, or 20 people to sponsor 30 pounds a month and so on.  The primary use of the money would be for staffing, as we desperately need to have nurses that are specifically trained, and employed, for looking after our new babies, as these little creatures are the people that are most often forgotten and left to die, whilst all attention is focussed on their mothers.  So if you have a heart for little babies, then please get in touch – I would love to give you more information and answer any questions you might have.

In the meantime, back to mopping up dog wee......hooray!