Lost in Translation? The joys of Luganda AND Sarah does some work!

Greetings friends and family, today we hope to share with you the joy and wonder of learning Luganda (the language spoken by the Baganda people who live in this area of Uganda, the kingdom of Buganda – we kid you not).  Whilst we are striving to improve, our efforts are not without associated difficulties.  A sample to whet the appetite:

Mukama Afuga: the Lord Reigns!

Mukama Afuuka: the Lord becomes...

Mukama Afuka: the Lord passes urine!

Subtle changes can make all the difference as you can see!

Luckily I think expectations for our Luganda skills is limited, so actual offense-causing is similarly limited.  It is fortunate for us that the people of Uganda are forgiving and friendly!

We also thought we might update you on what we are doing work-wise, in case you think all we do is entertain people by mispronouncing Luganda, and cruise the streets in Barry the Beefy Badboy Beast! Timmo will update you on his work another day, but I will talk a little bit about what I have been doing. 

I have been working at Kitovu hospital on the children’s ward and in outpatients, but have also been to Mulago hospital in Kampala to start to learn more about clubfoot management (using manipulation and bracing, which is cheaper and more effective than surgery). 

Working on the children’s ward involves accepting that at least 50% of my patients burst into tears immediately on seeing me, which is a bit disconcerting – I think perhaps they fear I am a ghost (perhaps I should work on the tan a bit).  And at least 70-80% of the mothers burst into laughter when I try out my Luganda.  Sigh.

But it is good working there – very rewarding, although scary at times.  I am regularly out of my depth (managing comatose malaria patients, commencing anticonvulsant drugs, scratching my head over starting TB treatment, wondering what to tell a mum whose baby appears to have a genetic disorder, trying to decide which sick children needs the oxygen concentrator most – the list goes on), but then spend most evenings fervently searching books, and the net, for management strategies and up to date research.  I am learning a lot and am really very thankful for good internet access!  

Barry The Beefy Badboy Beast!

Many of you may recognise this picture of an exuberant Jamal, from Slumdog Millionaire, post-voluntary dive into a pit latrine.  Before we continue, might we reassure you that this is not one of the things that we have delighted in since arriving in Uganda (yet).  However, we were reminded of this scene, on a recent excursion to visit the project farm, on a typical day during Uganda rainy season.

Tim, having got the church pick-up stuck in the mud, gallantly proceeded to try to escape, whilst our friend Rob (amongst other manly individuals) endeavoured to push.  Neither had realised that the wheels have a catch that needs to be turned in order to engage the 4WD.  So Rob ended up looking much like little Jamal, or perhaps even Augustus Gloop after a dip in Willie Wonka’s chocolate River.  Happy days!

Which leads us on nicely to Barry!  Still traumatised by the premature demise of our elderly rover, Ethel just prior to our departure to Uganda, (may her metallic carcass rest in peace), we have been on the hunt to find a fitting Ugandan equivalent! We therefore would now like to proudly introduce our Toyota Rav 4, which we have named Barry The Beefy Badboy Beast (a.k.a. Bazza)!

Barry was purchased from the wife of a Catholic priest (get your head round that one if you can!) and is a welcome addition to our family.  We feel extremely blessed to have found him, since he has all the main requirements: 

• 4WD;
• 5 doors (easier to put car seats in, when the need arises in the future!); 
• Boot space for medical supplies;
• A youthful sprightliness, that understates the 170,000km on his clock!

We hope that seeing his photo will entice you from far and wide to come and enjoy the soft caress of his seats on your booty!

Patience is a Virtue!

James 5:8 “Be patient and stand firm, because the Lord’s coming is near.”

This week, we feel that this verse is very fitting as we get to grips with life in Uganda once again, and for 2 reasons:

1. Firstly it is fitting, as one of the paramount virtues that one must possess in Uganda is patience.
2. Secondly, a number of times in this 3 weeks, one, or both of us, have found ourselves wondering whether in fact we may see the return of the Lord before we actually manage to: 

• Tuck into the starter we ordered about 5 years earlier from the lovely, albeit rather sloth-like waitress;
• Find the elusive electrician who is always going to be there in 1 hour - (5 days, and many phone calls later, he’s still just an hour away from arriving!);
• Get our visa sorted - of course, although the office should be open every day, so far it has only been open once, and of course the man was far too busy with the very important task of testing the comfort of his chair whilst picking his teeth to help us on that day!
• Setting up our Ugandan Bank account and receiving our bank cards - 4 days of waiting for our account to be registered was followed by 2 hours of waiting at the bank card window, only to then be informed that the machine was a "bit slow," and then another hour later, (after some pushing on Tim’s part), the admission that the machine was actually broken! 5 days later, after trying each day, and another hours wait and our bankcards did, astonishingly, beat the return of the Lord! Hallelujah!!

He’s coming soon people – be ready!!!

Team Crow Are On The R.O.L!!

We are sitting in our house in Bwala, Masaka, reflecting on a busy first 2 weeks, much of which has been taken up with sorting out the house and scrubbing away layers of filth that have doubtless been here for many years! Tim has done some expert DIY (no sarcasm here!) and has managed to blow a few things up, while Sarah cheerily proceeded to nearly burn the house down by leaving electric hobs on whilst the cooker was directly under the wooden kitchen work surface!

Other than that, here are some of the stand out moments so far:

Being clamped on our second day whilst borrowing our friend’s car;


Sarah being attacked by a bat, then accidently half squashing it, and then making Tim dispatch it brutally with a door stop whilst it made traumatising squeaking sounds;

The White Eagle boys putting on a welcome home production, featuring the story of how Tim and Sarah met (including Ivan Mujuzzi in drag, shaking his booty. There was some confusion as to whether he was representing Tim or Sarah!!).

Sarah making the schoolboy error of confusing the very similar Luganda words for “water” and the rude word for “poo” and also finding out that her ipod Luganda app had given her a word for “please” that actually means “dog”! Classic!

It’s great to be back!

World's Scariest Police Chases - Uganda Edition!!

Well my freinds, I've always said: "There's one thing I can say about living in Uganda, it's never dull!" Today I bring you another example but in order to take you through today's encounter let me hand you over to everybody's favorite Sheriff, Sheriff John Burnell (Ret.) - Channel 5 late night viewers know who I'm talkin about!

Sheriff Burnell: "Crazy Taxi Drivers....., Some of the world's most ridiculous police....., Cars built for 5 but carrying 10...., put these elements together and you have....THE WORLD'S SCARIEST POLICE CHASES.....IN UGANDA!!"

"Today: Wrong Taxi, Wrong Time! coming in at number 3 in our Top 10 List, Timothy Crow recites his experience of a hectic Police Chase - Ugandan Style!!"

Tim: "I was just doing what I always do, getting in a Taxi to Nyendo. The fact that it was carrying far too many passengers was nothing new, it's an everyday occurence here. What was a new experience however, was when a Ugandan Police Truck screeched to a halt besides us. 2 Policemen, armed with rifles, jumped out and ran towards our Taxi. The Driver started shouting! The 2 policemen pulled open the drivers door and front left passenger door. However, rather than handing himself over for whatever he'd done wrong (and the list could be rather long I'm sure!), the driver slamed his foot on the accelerator, swerving like a complete lunatic with the policemen still grabbing onto the doors!!"

"We narrowly missed hitting the police truck and nearly mowed down one of the policemen and then sped away at a speed which I was rather suprised that this ramshackle old Taxi could manage. As I and the other passengers looked back, the policemen were shouting: it seemed as though the driver of the police truck had stalled and they were some distance back!"

"I thought about jumping out, but knew that I would probably break a fair few bones so decided to enjoy the ride! And what a ride! Speeding past other road users, bouncing over potholes, narrowly escaping an abbrupt end with an oncoming Lorry."

"Still, on the up side it's the fastest ever trip I've made bewteen Masaka and Nyendo!"

Sheriff Burnell: "Tune in next time, for number 2 of our Top 10 Police Chases from around the world as a dangerous criminal makes a nifty getaway on a large goat in Nepal."